Things Become Clearer

I haven't written anything in the past few days, because I've been mulling over a lot. The pure happiness of soon moving to Henderson has given way to the reality of it. Not that there's a whole lot of difference between the mentally-flying-through-clouds-on-one's-own-power phase and thinking about what has to be done, because this is where we want to be, so it won't be as stressful as the past few times that we've moved. But it's a matter of thinking, "What do I want? This is my future."

I understood more yesterday sitting with Mom and Meridith at the McDonalds inside the Wal-Mart Supercenter on Carl Boyer Drive, right near the Food Center entrance. This was the second day that they were shopping for bras, the previous day spent at two Targets, with me reading Medium Raw by Anthony Bourdain, two different copies. And since I'm up to page 144, and there's 320 pages, I don't feel the need to buy it, so I'll just finish it whenever we get to another Target.

I don't have any concern about what we have to do in order to move. It has to be done, just like the previous times, and so it shall be done. We're good at that already. But what do I want to do? What would make me happy? I've indicated my plans before, but process and preferences also factor into it, what you need to make it work for you as you strive to achieve what you want.

At that McDonald's, Meridith and Mom's lunchtime and my slight snack of 6 McNuggets and a medium fry (I had had lunch before we left the house, but I wasn't going to pass up McNuggets), Mom talked again about our future apartment complex, and I remembered that Mom had told us before about the full-size basketball court. For me, it is like going back to Disney World. Las Vegas is an adult Disney World for me, and when we lived in Casselberry at the time we went to Disney World seemingly all the time, I had a basketball hoop next to the driveway. I'm getting that back, and I'm going to live somewhere that will likely fire my imagination often just like Disney World did for all those years. It fits.

But more than that, as Mom talked about many of her and Dad's experiences driving around Henderson, the restaurants they stopped at, the people they talked to, I figured out the perfect time to send my resumes and cover letters to the nearby schools that I hope will hire me: You see, the charter school in Henderson didn't quite work out. They started with a very lowball offer and not only that, but apparently, the computer tech guy is also privy to this information, as he was cc'd in various e-mails to my Dad, and that doesn't smell right. This should be a matter of privacy between the necessary parties. And when Dad wrote back with his request that the salary should be higher, also factoring in his experience, the reply e-mail was cc'd to people that you wouldn't think should be involved in such a decision-making process. So his resumes and cover letters are also going out to other schools now, schools within the Clark County District, too. And once he hooks into something and it's absolutely confirmed that we're on our way, I'm sending my resumes and cover letters. I want to be certain I can go on job interviews without any issue of distance.

Something else was also confirmed for me. I went back and forth on it for years, thinking that my life felt complete enough with my books and the ones I plan to write, and the ones I'm doing research for right now, but enough. I want someone to be as integral a part of my life as my books are. I want an avid reader, someone who loves old movies and is wary of current output, and just someone who lights me up emotionally and mentally.

Well, at that McDonald's, Mom described the guy at the apartment complex office in better detail than I had previously known. She said he loves old movies, hates the new ones. He used to be heavily into movies, though not as much as I was (For me, it used to be an all-the-time thing), and isn't as much now, preferring books (as I do). A lot of them; like I do.

He hasn't owned a TV in nine months, which I can't do because Jeopardy! doesn't come in a book.

After Meridith heard all this, she turned to me and said, "It's a shame he's not a girl."

I'm on the right track. My sister knows me all too well. I am not only sure of what I want in a potential mate, but I know that I don't want to spend years upon years looking for her. At 27, I'm still young, but I would like to enjoy that person, hopefully for the rest of my life.