Monday, February 16, 2009


(The inspirations for the title of this blog will be posted soon, as more thought is required than just sitting down at the computer to type whatever comes to mind)

On a paper rectangle taped to the top of each of the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory boxes for each of us, this is printed in four colors, blue for me:

For Our Special Rory Leighton
(and may it be a LOVE-ly year for you!)
Much Love,
Dad, Mom, Meffie &

"Special" is actually underlined, but there is no underline command on Blogspot. I thought there was.

Tigger and Kitty are our dogs, the dogs, and Jules, Ducky, Chippy and Chloe are our finches. The finches.

The order of the names under "Much Love" differ based on whose box of chocolates it is. And there's more asteriks on the actual rectangle of paper.

Mom also used this during last year's Valentine's Day, the same writing, the same design, the same "and may it be a LOVE-ly year for you!" which I suspect has different meanings for each of us.

For my dad, it's the hope for the continued stability of the marriage, as unstable as it has been over the years. Put this way: A month can never go by without a fight, no matter how small or intense. But that's not what has me writing about this Valentine's Day greeting.

I'm ok with the sentiment, but it's the "LOVE-ly" that bothers me. I know it means that Mom hopes I start dating, that I seek a relationship with someone. It's natural for a parent to want that, I know, but she should get used to me not wanting one and not seeking out one. I've explained this so many times, that I prefer my life the way it is, with more freedom afforded than a life with a relationship. I find more satisfaction in working on myself---writing, reading voraciously, watching movies, preparing to hopefully take online courses from Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University for a bachelor's degree in professional aeronautics---than in having to memorize a completely new person and adapt my life to intertwine with theirs. No. Not for me.

My refusal should have been known when we all were looking out the window of my parents' bedroom at an open garage with two kids playing a few inches outside it, part of a family that had just moved into that development. We commented on how cute the kids were, and Dad said that I'd have kids like that one day, and I replied, "Yeah, sure. Keep that hope alive." My mom replied with a sarcastic "thanks," and I'm not keen on disappointing anyone, but this is my life. I can do with it what I like.

LOVE-ly? No thanks. It's better like this. I've known that for years and am proud of it.